Well, I'm a big slacker. I think I was going for a record or something. Do you ever just feel like things in your life aren't going the way you want them to but there's really nothing you can do about it? Well, that's where I am right now. I feel like all I'm doing is disappointing people and messing everything up. Then there's the fact that I have been trying for a long time to get people to accept and include me. Well ,that's been pretty much a bust. I'm tired of the back and forth. Either include me and act like you want me around or don't but make a decision. I'll be fine wither way. Experiencing both is actually harder than being on my own. Hopefully things will get better soon and I can get out of this funk. But there are things to look forward to, like hanging out with Kate on Wednesday and seing my awesome little at some point. Every cloud has it's silver lining and Kate, Andria, and Ashley are part of that silver lining.

I must be off to work on a project and bask in the fact that I survived a test and a midterm today. Peace out!

I thought this semester was going to be different. This was the semester it was all supposed to change and I was supposed to be happy where I was. Guess not.

Don't get me wrong. There have been some amazing aspects of this semester. I joined a service sorority, Tau Lambda Sigma, this semester. I have had so much fun. Those girls are so amazing. In all honesty, TLS is a big part of why I stayed. I feel so accepted and supported there. I don't even want to think about what it would be like if I hadn't joined. Though I must admit it was a little awkward, at first, being the oldest new girl. I have made so many friends in TLS and I don't know what I would do without them. Shelley is amazing. She and I have a lot in common and she makes me laugh a lot. She is really easy to talk to and I like that. I'm so glad she's my friend. Then there's Kate, who also happens to be my big. She's such a great person. She inspires me to do great things and she is also easy to talk to. I feel like she has had to listen to a lot of negativity lately and I'm sorry she hasn't seen me at my best, but I like that I am comfortable enough to share my problems with her.She has been more helpful to me than I will ever be able to let her know. The only downside is that she' graduating in December and has a real job so I won't see her as often. But we'll figure it out.

The rest of my semester has been crappy and confusing and I don't really want to go into detail right now. Just know that I need lots of prayers and support right now.

Now it's time to go learn things in Pathophysiology. 

Did I make the right decision?

Is it really going to get better? I feel like I made the wrong decision and there's no turning back now, so I have to suck it up and deal with it.

I wish I had someone to talk to who understands my problem. GRRRRRRR

AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Am I done yet?